Marcy.

currently listening to:I Will Remember You/Sarah Mclachlan.

sometimes, you get so caught up in your own little life, your own little concerns-- that you forget about the bigger picture. the rest of the world.

today was a pleasant slap in the face, reminding me that there are more important things in life than going to the beach or baguio with friends, and the fact that i dont have enough money to buy myself a new pair of sneakers.

but so what? it isn't the end of the world.

meet myself, anne, carolyn (my sister), and ryan (carl's boyfriend). volunteers for the Make-A-Wish Foundation.



today, we hung out with Marcy, an 18 year old boy with leukemia. Marcy said he wanted three things the most: a component, to go to festival mall, and to meet Bayani Agbayani.

we were supposed to take him to the taping of Yes Yes Show last tuesday to see Bayani, and were supposed to take him to festival mall today to go to the arcade--but he had been feeling ill all week and couldn't leave the house. last night, he was rushed to the hospital because he was experiencing a lot of pain.

so today, the four of us went to him instead.


(ryan, marcy and myself)


thanks to the Foundation, we were able to give Marcy a component, a cd player, and a microphone (for videoke purposes, of course!)--and we were able to buy him P1500 worth of OPM cd's to keep him company as he rests in bed :) not only that, we plan to take him to festival mall when he recovers from his treatment! :)

and that's not all...






marcy and bayani!


something tells me that marcy had a good day today. and so did i. :)

yay. :)

surviving zambales.

as you can probably tell from the past few posts---wenk is in dire need of a break.

thank god wenk got it.






and no, i am not pregnant. =)

my stupid, stupid, stupid mouth.

My stupid mouth
Has got me in trouble
I said too much again

....

Oh another social casualty
Score one more for me
How could i forget mama said "think before speaking"
No filter in my head
Oh whats a boy to do?
I guess i better find one

blech.

currently listening to:All For You/Sister Hazel.

why do we have to live in a world where everything has to mean something, even if it really means nothing in particular? why does every single action have to have a reason?

drat.

nothing.

currently listening to:Incomplete/Ari Hest.


slowly. slowly.

squished. swallowed. stomped on.
strangled.
to my death.

played like a puppet.

forced.
to feel. to breathe the air.

but i feel nothing.
i breathe nothing.

venting.

well, ladies and gentlemen, it is once again the point in time wherein i find myself extremely full of some kind of emotion that needs to be released. badly.

today's emotion: frustration.

once again.

FRUSTRATION.

i just keep finding myself in situations where all i can do is just sigh and say "nevermind", or where i just shut up and wish with all my might that if keep silent, close my eyes and maybe click my heels three times, the heavens above would somehow just make certain situations go away. or at least get me away from these situations. God, how i wish.

i just

HATE

it when people don't understand me, and i especially hate it when they don't even make an effort to understand me or my situation. i hate it when people jump to conclusions. i hate it when people rely so much on you, and don't do anything for themselves. i hate it when people are so smug/cocky/obnoxious and think that they're all that, when they're not. i hate it when people are just so friggin' makulit and they can't seem to get the point that they are. i hate it how people get by certain things with NO effort whatsoever. i hate it when people pretend to be people they're not. i hate it when people just call me masungit or cranky and don't even make an effort to understand why. i hate it when all my efforts go without a thank you. i hate not being able to get a drink with friends, or watch a movie, or go to the beach, or have a leisurely lunch, or even get a good night's sleep. i hate it that some people take it too personally that i don't have time to get a few drinks, watch a movie, go to the beach, or have leisurely lunch. i hate how people jump to conclusions with what they see or hear--kung pwede naman magtanong. i hate it how some people seem to be doing so well with everything, and i can't seem to do well with a single one of my priorities. i hate having soooo much emotion and thoughts bottled up inside and not having a single person to share it with--kasi ayaw ko din. i hate knowing daaaays in advance that you're not getting any sleep tonight, tomorrow, and the day after that.

and i hate being in this state, because once i started a "i hate it how..." statement, i just couldn't seem to stop, and my mind started racing with more and more things to hate. roar.

-----------------------------
sorry.

it's just that i'm so emotionally drained--i'm so tired of trying to keep a calm and cheerful front--i'm so tired of trying to be patient and understanding and extremely nice. in fairness, i haven't had a major explosion in the last couple of weeks, so i guess it was just about time. every day is just so darn tiring, and it's taking all the effort i can possibly muster just to get through a single day.

im just so tired of being tired.

once again. today's word:

FRUSTRATION.